Wednesday, February 28, 2007

My father

I've been thinking a lot about the way I wanted to blog about my experiences over the past twelve days. At first I wasn't sure I wanted to talk about it at all. But the events that have taken place and their relevance to my life are far too substantial and devastating not to mention.

My father died on the morning of Saturday February the 17th. Peacefully, while he slept, his heart just decided to stop beating. He was only 58 years old.

My father was my inspiration from the beginning. From the time I could hold a crayon between my fingers I would say I wanted to grow up to be "an artist, just like my daddy." He informed my sense of design from an early age. I was blessed with a limitless supply of pencils, markers, paper supplies, wood working tools, collage materials, etc., not only because of my father's business as an industrial/graphic designer but because he wholeheartedly supported my creative endeavors, in whatever form they manifested. He was the first to believe in my abilities and an endless source of support and encouragement throughout. When I graduated college, he helped me set up my first jewelry studio, enabling my career to take shape. He read my blog regularly, frequented my website for new work and never failed to acknowledge my accomplishments. I always aim to make him proud.

Beyond the artistic, my father and I had a relationship based on a lot of unspoken understanding. We could relate to each other in ways unique to the rest of my family. My dad valued his privacy. Listened more than spoke. He was kind, humble and sensitive. He adored animals (most especially cats) and at times I wondered of he didn't prefer their company to humans! He loved and respected nature and instilled in me those and many other values. He believed and repeated the golden rule to my sister and I so many times as kids we rolled our eyes at him the second we heard him start… "Do unto others…" He did treat others the way he wanted to be treated; even BETTER than how he wanted to be treated most of the time. He has taught and given me so much.

There is much to say about my father, and this mere fraction cannot begin to describe who he was and all that he meant to me. I'm fortunate to have so many fond memories to hold and to savor and to comfort me even though it hurts to know we won't have the opportunity to create more. Here's to dad… whom I'll miss more than anything.

13 comments:

Miss Dot said...

I am so sorry to hear this news. 58 is way to young to be taken. Your post describes a wonderful man who must have been a great influence on your life and will be greatly missed. Thank you for sharing this with the blogsphere.

jenny said...

midge,
i hope it's ok to say that my heart goes out to you...i just subscribed to your wonderful blog after reading about your work on whip up...and read this moving post.

your love for your father is precious, and from what you write, he sounds incredible. you are lucky to have all those memories that you describe, and i hope they keep you comforted at this time.

Midge said...

Thank you both for your kind words, I do appreciate them very much.

Midge said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Caroline said...

I Just wanted to add my sincere sympathy for your considerable loss, I will not pretend to knowyou, however I know what Loss is and I hope you have friends and family to hug right now, add a 'virtual'hug from me too.

Barb Krogmann said...

Margaux, Your comments were beautiful and truly spoke to what your dad was all about. I am blessed to have such special nieces and nephews. We are blessed with a remarkable family. I love you. Aunt Barbie

Rebecca-the-Wrecker said...

So sorry to hear of your loss - your father seemed like a wonderful and inspiring man.

LisaJay said...

Midge, I'm so sorry. My dad was 64 when we lost him very suddenly, as you lost your dad. I know how much pain you must be in, and my heart goes out to you. What comforted me the most was when someone said "Our pain is the measure of our love for him." I will hold you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

--Lisa

masaoms said...

I'm sorry for you, i lost my father when i was 18 and the only thing i can say is "nodoby dies if you can remember". Every day when i work i look my hands and i reflects my father hands working. My pieces are his pieces. I will hold you in my heart.

Midge said...

I have learned of so many people lately who have also lost a parent, it's unreal. So much loss and heartache. I thought I might have been able to empathize with the pain of losing a parent before my father died, but now I realize I couldn't have, not fully anyway. I understand loss in a way I never have before.

My heart goes out to all of you as well. Thank you for sharing and for your wonderful thoughts and beautiful quotes. It all helps, and forces me to remember I am not alone in this.

LOVE,
Midge

selflesh | s. Rankin said...

M,

I found your blog through flickr (designsponge) and your site. I wanted to tell you how much I love your work, especially the simple hand pieces.
+
Now I see that you have lost your father.
I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.

Looking forward to seeing more of your work.
Take care.

Best,
>s

beth said...

nice words about your dad, I miss him too. I love you and will call your mom today, nice photo too.
love you, b

Anonymous said...

I love your pieces, and I was moved by the story about your father. I am sure he was extremely proud of you.

Keep up the fantastic creativity for your dad--and for us.

f-